More Mindset: Five Things I Learned When I Saw Brené Brown
They're woven into my manifesto for life.
I was looking through an old notebook the other day and came across pages of scribbles I made eight years ago when I went to see Brené Brown being interviewed by
, then Editor of Psychologies Magazine. Those notes sent me down a deeply pleasurable rabbit hole and reminded me of some rich, life wisdom that I wanted to share with you.My introduction to Brené Brown
I first came across Ms Brown – as many do – over a decade ago while browsing the TED website. I was late to the TED game and when I saw that this woman had racked up millions of views with her talks, The Power of Vulnerability, and Listening to Shame, I was curious and dug in (as you should if you haven’t seen them).
For the first couple of minutes of the first talk, I didn’t quite get it, or Brené for that matter. But suddenly… Oh my goodness she landed.
Her blend of folksy humanity and hilariously light touch drew me in, but it was her topic – vulnerability – and her blinding insight, powered by solid research, that had me sold. I told everyone to check her out (they looked at me pityingly and said “we already know”). I put the videos on the ‘required homework’ list for my mindset training clients.
Up close and personal
A few years ago I heard that Brené was coming to London on her Rising Strong book tour and was going to be interviewed on stage. The book carries the rousing tagline: “If we are brave enough, often enough, we will fall. This is a book about getting back up.”
Alrighty, I thought, and hurtled online to book my ticket. I was gutted to find the gig was sold out but sometimes, when you ask nicely, the universe listens. A kind friend invited me to tag along as her plus one.
That night, my pal and I sat spellbound at Brené’s cool-wedge-clad feet along with 998 other avid fans as, gracefully guided by Suzy Walker, she walked us through the heart of Rising Strong.
We and Brené knew we were in safe hands that night. As an interviewer, Suzy is skilled at drawing out her guests with empathy and intelligence, giving them space to reveal themselves and standing brilliant proxy for us, the audience. A few years later I saw her interview Liz Gilbert and it was just as satisfying an evening.
What’s she like, Ms Brown?
She describes herself as a “researcher and storyteller”. To that typically understated description I’d add “funny-as-feck compassionista with a finely-tuned ability to help us join the dots of our own lives”.
That night she was warm, perceptive and authentically herself. There was so much gold on offer. The biggest pleasure for me was how Brené used story, illuminating and entertaining us with a cascade of tales and examples – some planned, one or two clearly spur of the moment. Most were hilarious; several were moving. Often the stories exposed her own frailties but she never made herself look ridiculous, just human (and humane).
I love a good story; this quote used to be on the back of my business cards when I was a business writer. Ms Brown definitely swims with those fish.
So what did I learn that night?